“Leadership isn’t about you – it’s about others. It isn’t defined as individual success as a sales person who reaches for his own potential. It’s about helping others see and reach for their potential.”



All my Postmaster cadre I II friends,

I have something to share with you to overcome the stress in the present environment of new cadre acceptance, the waves of cadre restructure is under process and the peer pressures etc. These are the things to think over, read by me somewhere when I crossed on this subject.

Tattlers, whiners, and backstabbers have one goal in mind that is “make their world better at the expense of others.”

Console them and they propagate like destructive bunnies. Confront them and they go underground only to focus on you.

Success with tattlers, whiners, and backstabbers:

  • Listen. Use all the listening tools you’ve learned.
  • Acknowledge. It’s not enough to listen to understand; listen to make others feel understood. They won’t understand you until they feel you understand them.

At this point you’re thinking, doesn’t this encourage and propagate more of the same.

Ask, what are your choices?

Create responsibility by focusing the conversation of that person They will tell what they can’t do. Ask again. Help them get all their “can’t dos” out.

Ask, what do you want?

Negative people find it difficult to explain what they want. They consistently tell you what they don’t want. Listen to what they don’t want and ask again – what do you want. Their reply will be “no no no  and  not not not”

Critics say more about themselves than they say about you. They impose personal values and expectations as criteria to evaluate you and your behaviors.

The more you accomplishes the more you face criticism. Some will complain you didn’t accomplish the qualities. Others will criticize your methods, and some will question your motives -suggesting you’re driven by arrogant self-glorification.

Ask these 6 questions when you are criticized:

Consider sources:

1. Is the critic over you, your equal, below you, or outside your organization?

2. How much influence does the person have relative to your own?

Consider motivations:

3. Is your critic motivated by self-interest, your-interest, or organizational interest?

Consider values:

4. Does your critic share your values? This question is the most important question.

Consider results:

5. Will listening to your critic propel you toward your goals and move you closer to realizing your vision?

6. What consequences result if you ignore your critic?

Seven Guiding Principles:

1. Respond in ways that elevate you and your organization.

2. Never take criticism personally, focus on behaviors.

3. Always explore potential improvements.

4. Invite sincere critics to participate in improvements. Abraham Lincoln said, “He has a right to criticize, who has a heart to help.”

5. Listen to, thank, and then ignore persistent critics. If they persist, stop listening! Denny Strigl explains, ”The more you respond to criticism the more credence you give it.”

6. Never defend yourself by criticizing your critic.

7. Invite your advocates to be your critics.

Elbert Hubard suggests you can easily avoid criticism by saying nothing, doing nothing and being nothing.

Criticism stings sincerity the most. Sincerity, however, doesn’t give you a free-pass from criticism. While being criticized, keep your eye on vision; cling to values, and never let critics derail you.

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